Leaving our comfort zone

The last few months/weeks have been eye opening. I attended a discussion lead by authors Kevin Hoffman & Rhonda Roorda both of them were adopted transracially. I recently finished Kevin's Book, Growing Up Black in White. And today I finished a book, Beyond Good Intentions. It was written by Cheri Register who also wrote Are Those Your Kids. Listening to Kevin & Rhonda speak and reading these two books helped me realize more and more that I need to break out of my comfort zone. Being friends with other adoptive parents is going to be "enough".

I've been debating about emailing a fellow photographer (who is black). She is amazing and we have shared business ideas and help each other when needed. I didn't know what she would think about meeting up for lunch or a playdate. Is it weird to say, 'Can we please be friends outside of work stuff not just because I think you are cool, but because my son needs us to be friends'. Well I emailed her about getting together and I suspect she'll be happy to. I didn't tell her that I am hoping we can become lifelong friends so our kids can grow up together and help each other navigate through lifes hurdles-I'll wait and do that face to face.

We (and by we I mean I but my husband will go along with just about anything for our son's sake) have been considering church. We are hoping to find a diverse church to attend. I'm just not sure if I need to find an all or almost all black church or if a 50/50 mix is enough. I don't think I would feel uncomfortable either way. My concern with a diverse church is that we will wind up making friends with the white families by some sort of default. I've been to black churches for work-photographing weddings and even attended events for some of "my kids". I have alway felt very welcome. I'm not sure if that will be different now that I have a black son.