I keep asking for some sign on what I am to be doing-on where this adoption path should lead us. Here's the question: What if the sign comes and I am too blind to see it? I really need a slap me in the face, knock me on my ass kind of a sign at the moment.
We have considered increasing our age range. It breaks my heart to think that a child who is 2, 5, 7 or any age is too old to be adopted. But we also know that there is just something about a baby. We would like to have that experience.
So I am up. It is 7a.m. on Sunday morning and I have been awake for 2 hours. I look at the blogs (because what else do you do this early on Sunday morning). I see that a Holt family has received an infant referral after waiting 2 weeks. I am thrilled for them. She is a beauty. They will probably have her home before we have our referral. At what point is enough enough?
My major dilemma: does this get into ethical gray area to switch agencies to get a quicker referral? I just don't see an end in sight with CHSFS. What if we switch and Holt's wait goes up?
I'm also concerned about the embassy and court issues. Larger agencies are taking much longer to get embassy appointments because they only get 20 appts a month.
If we stay with CHSFS I am truly concerned we will get stuck in 2010 court closures! The irony is that I was worried about that for this year as well.
I am questioning every decision I have made and ever possible option. Nobody said it would be this hard!
6 comments:
Oh, Amy. I wish I knew the right answer. Given that your wait times keep going up, I can totally see why you would want to switch. The tunnel keeps getting longer and longer. It has to be heart breaking. How could you have predicted this would happen - you couldn't. Please don't blame yourself for the decisions you made. So many of these adoption decisions are such a leap of faith. I am here for you! Hugs!
what a hard place to be - I also totally see why you would switch agencies. I don't think anyone could fault you on switching.
Amy, call me later on to chat if you have a chance -- I'll be around!
have you thought about african american domestic? some agencies have very short waits, like 6 months or less. our agency said 3-11 months and we have been waiting almost 5 months. a friend of mine with a diff agency got her baby after 5 months.
We love Holt, not just because of fast referrals (actually, when I chose them initially, that wasn't even a consideration)...they are highly ethical, conservative, have wonderful humanitarian projects in ET, communicative, professional...and right now they're just able to fill so many referrals so quickly because of such an influx of children to their care centers. They're telling families they wait will be around 1 month - but obviously ours was only 2 weeks. The choice to switch is very personal...but please email me with any questions about Holt anytime (awaitingourfirst@hotmail.com).
hey gal, just catching up. try to remember why you found your agency so appealing in the first place.
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